Cocktails at Sunset

I've been thinking a lot about relationships and what makes them work (or not). Cocktails at sunset are great "memory makers" once in a while, but that is not what brings couples closer together. What brings you closer together is entrusting your heart to each other and regarding that trust as a lofty honor along with a set of mundane daily responsibilities. When you give your heart away you're making yourself vulnerable. When life deals you a blow it is sometimes tempting to push the sadness aside to make room for happier feelings because I know that I never want anyone or anything to have the satisfaction of stealing my joy. But when does handling things privately become a habit? You cannot eliminate painful episodes from your history together so use these events to grow closer by grieving together and growing together. Don't lock each other out! If you've been through enough with each other to know that you can't trust the other with your heart then maybe you've got a compelling argument for a reckoning so that you can deal with your distrust of each other. If you don't have a reason to lock each other out then speak up. There is no reason that one person gets to feel everything and the other nothing.

Timeline

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zI3lXSOt3c
MercyMe - "Finally Home"


Well it's been a while since I wrote last...a couple of weeks, I guess.

Here's just a few comments about the timeline of the last couple weeks:

• George passed away Tuesday night (March 10) just before 10pm.
• Since I get 3 days bereavement leave I took off Wed, Th and Fri.
• I packed and cleaned house all day Wed.
• Thursday morning I took the dogs to the kennel and got on the road to Jackson about noon and arrived in Jackson about 3:30. Visitation was at Arrington Funeral Home from 5p-7p. There were people lined up at the funeral home from 4:30-7:15...it was nice to see how many people's lives George had touched.
• The funeral service was Friday (March 13) at 2pm.
• Dave and I drove home to LR on Saturday. After arriving home late Sat afternoon we still had to get prepared for the LR Marathon on Sunday morning.
• 8am Sunday (March 15) was the start of the LR Marathon. Dave ran the 1/2 in approx 2 hours 6 minutes. Sunday pm we went to the Clinton Library for the post race party.
• Tuesday (March 17) morning Dave took Bashful (one of our rabbits) to the vet. After opening her up the vet found she was full of cancer. We decided to let her go meet George in heaven that evening.
• Wednesday (March 18) Dave went to pick Bashful up at the vet's office, and that evening when I got home from work we buried her in the backyard along with all our other animals that have passed away over the years.
• Dave went back to work yesterday and today. But we still need to go to the repair shop to pick up the truck. I guess we'll do that tonight. The morning I got up to go to Jackson the truck was deader than a door nail.

This is all I'm going to write right now. I need to go get in the shower, but I'd like to write more about relationships and all the lives George touched over the years. I guess I'll do that later...

Love,

jane

Get Busy & Stay Busy

After Dave got on the road yesterday I decided I needed to get busy and stay busy. Otherwise, I'll sit in front of the tv watching HGTV and drinking wine way too early. So I decided to get outside, get some fresh air and work in the yard.

I started by cutting back some tree limbs and prickly blackberry vines in the "no man's land" that is next to our property. Then I moved on to mowing the lawn. That first mow of the season is always a little more time consuming than normal. After finally getting the mower started I had to empty the bag after every other swipe of the lawn. Things are starting to look better! I figured if I didn't get started and do just a little at a time that Dave and I would be hard pressed to get things in order after the marathon, but before things really start blooming.

I've talked with Dave several times yesterday and today. Just before Dave arrived at the hospital yesterday the surgeon came out to give a brief of the surgery. The way the message was received was that things are not looking good, and to basically prepare for the worst. But Dave says that after he was able to see George and speak with his nurse that for a surgery of this magnitude George is actually doing as well as can be expected at this point. They are going to have to possibly do some dialysis (Dave would say his kidney's have crossed their arms as if to pout, and are refusing to work) So far everone seems to be holding up emotionally -- for a family that's known for being emotional that's good. I'm glad Dave was able to go be with them because he's such a strong, calming force with lots of medical knowledge. He's so good at explaining things in understandable terms. I'm really lucky to have found someone of his caliber. He truly is one of those "one in a million" people that push themselves to do better, but without being fanatical and annoyingly perfect.

Awakened by a Phone Call

Last night we "sprung forward"!! Now that sounds "cuntry"!!

We stayed up late watching the Ultimate Fight pay-per-view so by the time we got to bed and set the clocks forward it was after 1am.

The phone rang at 7am...it was Toolie. He called to say that George was taken to the hospital, by ambulance, around 4am. The diagnosis is an abdominal aneurism. We packed for Dave, and Dave made phone calls to get off work. I made breakfast burritos. He got on the road about 10:30am.

I wish I could have gone to Jackson too!!